Don't drink and baby...maybe?

We went on a picnic yesterday with Don Julio’s sister, his neice, and his sister’s boyfriend. It was pretty pleasant, though I definitely got a little too much sun and halfway conked out during the last hour of our poker game. I was also pleased that Don Julio’s sister - who’d never played a game of poker in her life and would put down huge bets for a pair of twos – miraculously whooped his ass.

I still feel a little shy around his sister; I never really know what to say to her. She was a girly-girl, and used to be a smoking, drinking, party it up all night starting at fifteen badass. I never know what to say to badasses, except ‘Erp! I think Alexander the Great is neat! Run away!’ Obviously she’s chilled since being a mom, though, and with a new baby on the way she’s totally given up smoking, and mostly given up drinking.

Yeah, that’s right. Imagine yourself in my place, hearing a pregnant woman ask for a beer, seeing her argue a little with her boyfriend about it (‘That’s it for the day!’ he says), and watching flabbergasted as your boyfriend pours her a cup. I just kept looking from his sister, to her boyfriend, to Don Julio over and over again. I mean, what do you say? ‘Don’t drink that!’? I reasoned that the woman is thirty-five and already has a kid, and must be well aware of what she can and cannot do when pregnant.

Even so, it bothered me, and as much as I tried to keep a neutral expression, like most of you know, even when I’m trying, the quirks of my face cannot be contained (Unless there’s a surprise party – I’m so good at those). Don Julio’s sister must have seen my look, because she started to explain to me that drinking a beer a day is perfectly acceptable, and even thought to be beneficial for the production of breast milk. I’ve heard something similar to the latter bit –that drinking stouts and other nutrient heavy dark beers is actually good for nursing mothers – except that I’d always understood you were supposed to start drinking after you’d had the baby. I said something along the lines of ‘Oh, how interesting! I heard something kind of similar...They told my mom to drink Guiness after she had my sister.’ And then I just nodded, unsure of where to go. Don Julio had to repeat a part of what I was saying because she couldn’t understand me (this actually had already happened twice when I was alone with her and her boyfriend – she kept mishearing what I was saying and he laughingly had to point out that to her that she’d replied to an entirely different question), and I just kind of gave up on the topic at that point.

I know my reaction probably would have been a lot clearer if I’d just explained that in the US, it’s medically and socially forbidden to drink when pregnant. Sometimes, though, I get annoyed with saying ‘In the US it’s like this...’ over and over again, and in any case, I was too tired to figure out how to say it without sounding condescending or judgemental. No doubt I came off as both by saying nothing at all. Lord. I’m pretty sure it was forgotten by the end of the day, and probably they just went back to their usual impression of me as someone polite, nice, but fairly quiet. But that irritates me, too. More on that another time.